And the bottom drops out

Weeping and gnashing of teeth

The pit of despair

Crap.

Sucks.

Make a choice. When things don’t go our way, when things are depressing, worrisome, or just plain crappy, make a choice. I can choose to wallow in misery, self-pity, doubt, anxiousness, and despair OR I can choose JOY. I can live out James 1:2-4 and Consider it ALL joy.

We recently got a call from our realtor and our buyers’ buyers are not going to be able to follow through and close on their house; therefore, our buyers can’t buy our house. After literally FREAKING out and having a complete meltdown, I was convicted at just how easily my faith wavers. God is still in control. He knew before we even made a move that this would happen.

My hubby was great with me. He let me freak out, and then as only a man can, he suggested how we would “fix it.” He offered to take on a second job, work with his dad, or start driving a bus for extra money. We talked about me doing more photography or opening an etsy shop or adding things to my Mom’s booth in an antique store. We talked about what we can do without–no TV or internet at our place, no eating out, no Sonic runs, no extras of any kind. We prayed together, and gave it all to God.

I’m constantly reminded as I continue the unpacking process and face this whole we-still-own-a-house-and-are-renting-another, how much of it is just STUFF. It doesn’t matter in eternity. It’s not relationship. It’s not people. It’s not a legacy. It’s not giving God glory. It’s STUFF…{kinda makes me want to go on a massive purge}.

I could so easily dwell on worry—how will we pay for both homes, boys’ birthdays (along with TEN other family members), Christmas, etc. Will we even be able to come out “on top” when our home finally sells? INSTEAD, I need to focus on what we have to be thankful for–we aren’t homeless, in fact, we have two homes! No one in our immediate family is sick. We have good jobs. We have family and friends who love and support us. Most of all, we have a God who is Sovereign. He knows the number of hairs on my head; He knows my heart, my worries, my fears, and He’s going to take care of it all.

If anyone knows me well, they know I’m a natural worrier–I believe I come by this genetically. 😉 In all honesty, my first reaction to situations like this is not to pray or to say “God is in control.” Unfortunately, my initial reaction is to call my husband or mom instead of going to the One who knows all things. I’m learning. Perhaps, this is just another lesson in reminding me to do that–give it to Him.

And when the poop hits the fan….it may be messy, it may not be fun, but I have a choice to make, and I’m going to CHOOSE joy. I choose to trust God. I choose to give glory to His name no matter the circumstances.