It’s Been a Minute

I’m not even certain when the last time I logged on to this site was–I’m thinking it was at least one kid ago, possibly two. If that’s the case then we are talking 5-7 years of silence. It’s a shame that hasn’t been what my brain has felt like for the past 5-7 years. Silence is golden. Silence is rare. My thoughts have raced and huffed and puffed for what feels like a century, but in fact, it’s only been a decade. Having children changes your brain. It’s scientific fact, and I didn’t need to read a peer-based review to tell me.

Where and how do I begin to catch up on what feels like a century? I’ll start with child #3 and child #4. One of God’s greatest gifts to earth, GIRLS. I love them fiercely. The old poem quips that they are “sugar and spice and everything nice.” Mine definitely got a lot more spice than sugar.

Current job status–employed at a church leading little ones, specifically, birth to PreK kiddos. The kids are a joy. My job is a mixed bag. I suppose most things in life are mixed bags. It has heavy days, light days, in-between days, days where I question what I’m doing, days where I’m certain there’s no where else I’d rather or should be.

Current home status–husband, four kids, one dog, and a lot of noise, clutter, cracks, gopher holes, and sweet memories. I’m continually working on finding contentment in my home and not comparing it to the world of Insta.

Current dream–to pay off some debt, travel with our crazy crew, and make even more sweet memories. Perhaps I’ll write more often. Perhaps it’ll be another 5-7 years before I catch up. Either way, it’s nice to know this place is still here for me to pause and reflect.


An update…

Life is funny. Just when I think I have a good routine down and things are smoothly sailing along…BAM. Life happens. And for us, that means a new life–I’m pregnant! Baby number #3 is due in the end of September. Basically this means, I’ve been a COMPLETE slacker in 99% of the areas of my life–my house is a mess, my boys watch too much TV, I avoid cooking, and all I want to do is sleep. Last week I finally felt more “myself” and a lot less nauseous, so I’m hoping my slobbish slacking will come to end and I’ll find some motivation to get my act together.

Here are some pictures of the boys that we used to announce on social media…C is pretty excited about the new baby, and of course H has no clue what is happening and just how much his world is going to be rocked.

number 2

number 3



2014 was hard. Very. Very. Hard.

I am SO eager to see what 2015 has in store for our family, because I have an inkling it’ll be better than 2014, but even if it isn’t, I know now that we can probably handle whatever is in store.

If I think over the past year, it was really only the second half of the year that was difficult. The first half was a bit of a blur–the usual school/work/church/life/family/friends/chasing toddlers busy-ness.

July was a mix of excitement and faith….putting a house on the market, leaving my babies behind for a week long mission trip, and learning to let go a little.

August taught me that it was possible to keep a house “show-worthy” with two littles and a husband and a dog. I honestly didn’t know I could keep a home as spotless as I did while working full-time. Looking back, I’m certain I didn’t spend much quality time with my guys though–I mostly followed behind them picking up, dusting, sweeping, and shining.

September taught me to trust God’s timing–an offer fell through, or rather didn’t even make it to contract. I suddenly knew one of the highest of highs and (thought) the lowest of lows. Thankfully, on September 18th, another offer DID lead to a contract…

October 2014 was quite possibly the most STRESSFUL month of my life–planning a move, making that move (all the while blogging and venting about it), and then REALLY experiencing lows–losing a fury family member within a week of moving, followed by a dreaded phone call that our buyers wanted to back out. I remember thinking things couldn’t get much worse, and then November rolled around…I had a miscarriage–a chemical pregnancy–some sort of sick joke nature plays where you think you’re just having a period but really you’re not. In some ways, I wish I had never known–it just led to heartache, questions, and blood tests, but in other ways, I’m grateful I know that some of my CRAZINESS was really due to a cocktail of hormones and not just me losing my mind. (At least that’s what I tell my hubby.)

C.S. Lewis quotable

December has been an absolute BLUR. On the 5th, we FINALLY closed on the house, with the buyers who signed on September 18th! We then frantically bought Christmas gifts, along with making quite a few, and had a slew of celebrations with family and friends–I believe we participated in 7 or 8 Christmas meals and gift exchanges.

All this leads me to realize how BLESSED we are. Yes, moving was hard. Losing Izzy and a baby was hard, but I believe that our marriage is stronger, and my faith is too.

2015 will be FULL of changes too, and I know it will be hard–we are going to become a one income family, I’m going to make the huge adjustment of staying home with the boys, and (Lord willing) focus more on an Etsy shop, Junk Hippy, and photography….hurrah for “momtrepreneurship.” 😉

My best friends.


We definitely have our moments–I’m pretty certain all mothers, daughters, and sisters do–but the three women in this photo are ladies I wouldn’t want to live without. I can remember as a young girl and teenager wishing I had a brother, but I don’t think we’d be nearly as close. I mean, I doubt I’d call him about “female” issues at 10 pm at night.

I couldn’t be more proud of my sisters, and if the Lord chooses to bless me with a daughter, I’d have to pray for another one or two so she wouldn’t have to face life without a sister and best friend.

Also, this shot was a simple self-timer photo. Nikon D7000, 50mm lens, ISO 500, 1/320 SS, f4.


Day 16: I get by with a little help from my friends {#write31days}

We could NOT have moved without a very helpful group of people–our family, our tribe, our village. My parents and the hubby’s parents help[ed] us continually by caring for our boys, my sisters and some friends form church helped with packing and childcare. On moving day, we had two ladies and four men from our Sunday School class and my sisters and brothers-in-law. My mom watched the boys, and we moved in under four hours. (unpacking and getting settled is never-ending it seems).

a lot of stuff

I truly struggle sometimes with letting my guard down and showing that I DON’T have it all together–I NEED help. These people are the ones that I can be vulnerable with. I can let them see that things are not always hunky dory, and they don’t judge me for it. Without them around on moving day, well, we’d still be moving things. We are TRULY grateful and blessed to have such amazing friends and family who tirelessly give of their time and energy to help us out.

Day 4: Izzy {#write31days}

The only other female in our house, is our dog Izzy. She is my husband’s “daughter.” He loves her like a human being–they cuddle every night, and she craves his attention. Also, if the boys or I are messing with him in any way, all he has to do is say, “Izzy!” and she’s on the attack. I got her from a shelter six years ago as a Christmas gift for the hubby. For two years she was our only “child,” and she slept on our bed with us every night until baby boy two came along. She’s highly intelligent, fiercely loyal, active, loud, and loving. She also has lymphoma.


We’ve known for a month now, and she’s on some medication to see if it will send it into remission–there’s a 50% chance. I dread the day–be is soon or far away that she is no longer with us. The boys LOVE her, and every time we walk in the door after being away, they say “Izzy!” and try to find her. Moving will be a HUGE adjustment, but losing Izzy will quite possibly be harder. Harder to explain, and I’m certain, will bring many more tears than packing boxes does. For now, hopefully we will fiercely love our crazy dog a fraction of the amount she loves us.



Edited to add: On October 18, 2014, Izzy passed away in the arms of her “daddy.” We will forever miss her and are grateful for the way she fiercely loved us. 

Perhaps an update is appropriate…

This will probably end up being a rather lengthy, random, catch-all post of sorts….perhaps I’ll find the time to add pictures later.

Summer is over. {Insert sad-face emoji here} I had some rather good intentions about blogging over the summer, but chose instead to ignore those intentions and focus on putting our house on the market. We spent June “playing”–zoo trips, parks, walks, play dates with friends, VBS, Jim Thorpe game, cleaning, decluttering, more cleaning, more decluttering. On July 1st, we met with a realtor, and by July 6th, our home was listed online with photos. Ever since, we’ve had a s t e a d y stream of showings along with one offer (the buyers backed out within two weeks of offering though). Unfortunately, things don’t seem to be moving very quickly. I’m learning more in this time than ever before to just trust God’s timing. He holds the world in His hands, so I’m pretty sure He can handle the selling of our place. Also, since football season is in full swing, I’m not too keen on someone buying it *NOW* because I’d end up doing 90% of the packing, searching for a new place, and the stressing. Oh and  Mom and I have less than a month before Junk Hippy, so there’s that….

Basically, life is busy, overwhelming, and I’m having to DAILY choose to meditate on Isaiah 26:3-4, “You will keep {her} in perfect peace, because {she} trusts in you. Trust in the Lord forever, for in God the Lord, we have an everlasting rock.”

Three Point Five {on my baby being three and a half}

T I M E   F L I E S

Last night, he walked out of the garage to follow his daddy and “help” mow. I reminded him about staying off the street because of “fast cars,” and he immediately replied “I’ll be fine” with a thumbs up. I laughed on the outside, but mostly in an effort to avoid crying.


Everyday he says something clever, new, and I am amazed at what a spectacular young man God has given us. I worry (waaaaaaaaaay too much) that the influences of the outside world, other people, and media will harm him, but I MUST remember that our Heavenly Father loves him infinitely more than I can even begin to imagine.


He admires his Daddy, me, and by the Grace of God, we’ll do our best to show him Christ’s love and help him learn that his greatest calling is to glorify God, love Him and love others.


Having him look at me with his 3 and half year old wisdom and say “I’ll be fine,” was a heavenly reminder that God is in control and the plans He has for my little man are greater than any I can think of.

DSC_6775He is a fierce lover (and sometimes fighter), passionate, assertive, creative, intuitive, and just plain fun! I can’t wait to see what the rest of “three” is like!

Brownie Baking {also known as the time I realized my baby isn’t a baby}

So, my hubby took some fun pictures of C licking the brownie bowl. (Sorry, Betty Crocker, I know you have a note on the back of your box saying never to consume raw brownie batter, but c’mon! In my world, 87% of the reason I make brownies is so I can lick the bowl and/or spoon.) Anyway, when I uploaded these images, I may have gotten a little teary. My baby is not a baby, and I’ve known this for a while, but now he doesn’t even look like a toddler! He is a boy! A small man-child!

Random side-note: we have been ruined and can no longer make brownies without adding Reese’s peanut butter chips.


Six Years

Happy Anniversary to me and my man! Six years ago today I was all nervous-giggly and talkative. (I get SUPER talkative and giggle WAY too much when I’m nervous or anxious.)  A lot of our wedding day is a blur, but I do remember a cold shower–our hotel had hot water issues–make-up at the Clinique counter with some of my bridesmaids, not having much to eat because of nerves, and having some of my closest friends hold my wedding dress up while I used the bathroom. I remember our pastor encouraging me to always be Rusty’s cheerleader and encourager…something I admit I could work on more. I remember our limo driver driving off with our wedding meal, and I remember my mother-in-law calling my new husband just minutes after we drove away….not funny at the time, but it’s something I can laugh at now.


Little did I know that six years, two houses, two kids, one dog, two churches, and four schools later, I’d love this man more than I did on the day we married. It’s not a grand, romantic love like the media tends to portray, but a better one. It’s deep, unconditional, and reassuring. I am blessed to have a man who loves me enough to change dirty diapers, clean up poop, wipe snotty noses, give numerous baths, read thousands of bedtime stories, wake up early, pick up milk and eggs (and probably some cookies), and make sacrifices for his family. He loves the Lord, and he demonstrates his love for me in ways I never imagined. He gives up time with his friends, watching live sports events (thank the Lord for the invention of the DVR!), and extra duties at school in order to make his family a priority. I am forever grateful for his leadership, commitment, sacrifice, and that he can always make me laugh (and probably roll my eyes too). He’s an amazing father, husband, and friend, and I’m so excited to see what is in store for us in the years ahead